How To Clean The Messiest Parts Of A Baby

Every parent hits a point where they’re holding a nappy in one hand, a wipe in the other, and wondering how something so small could produce something so enormous. Babies are messy. It’s not a design flaw, it’s just how they are for the first year or two, and once you know the basics of handling the sticky, gooey, gross bits, it stops feeling like a crisis every time it happens. Here’s a practical, no-nonsense guide to the parts of baby care that catch most new parents off guard.

Taking a Rectal Temperature Without Panicking

Rectal thermometers give the most accurate reading for babies under three months, which is exactly the age group where an accurate reading matters most. It sounds worse than it is once you’ve done it a couple of times.

How to do it:

1. Lay a clean towel or changing pad down first, so you’re not scrambling if there’s any mess.
2. Lay your baby on their back with knees bent up toward the chest, or on their tummy across your lap. Either works, whichever feels more secure to you.
3. Use a digital thermometer designed for rectal use and dab a small amount of water-based lubricant (like KY Jelly or plain petroleum jelly) on the tip.
4. Insert it gently no more than half an inch to one inch, just past the tip. Never force it. If you feel any resistance, stop.
5. Hold it steady until it beeps, then remove and read.

A normal rectal temperature sits somewhere around 97.9°F to 100.4°F. If your baby is under three months old and their rectal temperature is 100.4°F or higher, call your pediatrician straight away, even if they seem otherwise well. It’s one of the few genuine “phone the doctor now” situations in newborn care. If a reading looks unusually low, it’s more often a sign the thermometer wasn’t inserted properly than an actual problem, so try again rather than assuming the worst, but mention it to your doctor if it keeps happening.

Handling Diaper Blowouts

The classic blowout, where poop somehow escapes up the back and out the leg holes, catches out even parents on their third baby. A bit of preparation goes a long way.

How to do it:

1. Get everything within arm’s reach before you open the diaper: a clean nappy, a stack of wipes, and a bag or bin for the dirty one.
2. Lay down a washable or disposable changing mat underneath your baby.
3. Use the front of the dirty nappy to do a first rough wipe, then finish with baby wipes.
4. Always wipe front to back. This matters a lot more for girls, since wiping back to front can push bacteria toward the urethra and lead to a urinary tract infection, but it’s a good habit for boys too.
5. Seal the dirty nappy shut and get it out of reach immediately. Babies are surprisingly quick at grabbing things at the worst possible moment.

If the mess has gone up the back and onto clothing, it’s often quicker to strip the baby down in the bath or over the sink and rinse rather than trying to wipe everything clean on the changing table.

Getting Poop Out of Clothes

Baby poop stains are annoying but manageable if you deal with them before they dry in. Scrape off what you can with a spoon or the edge of a nappy, then rinse the fabric under cold running water from the inside of the garment out, so you’re pushing the stain away from the fabric rather than further into it. A stain remover or a soak in cold water with a bit of laundry detergent before washing helps a lot. Avoid hot water on fresh stains, as heat can set them. If you’re breastfeeding, newborn poop stains are usually easier to shift than formula-fed poop, which tends to be firmer and can leave more of a mark.

Clearing a Stuffy Nose

Babies can’t blow their own nose, and a blocked nose makes feeding and sleeping harder for them, so this is one of the more useful skills to have down. Saline drops and a bulb syringe or nasal aspirator (like a NoseFrida) are the standard tools.

How to do it:

1. Lay your baby on their back, or hold them semi-upright in your arms with their head tilted back slightly. Never do this with your baby flat and unsupported, or with their head tipped forward.
2. Put two to three saline drops into each nostril. You don’t need more than that, and a few drops missing the mark won’t cause any harm.
3. Wait about a minute for the saline to loosen the mucus.
4. Use the bulb syringe or nasal aspirator to gently suction each nostril. Squeeze the bulb before inserting it, not after, then release once it’s in place.
5. Wash the bulb syringe in warm soapy water after every use, and give it an occasional soak in a vinegar and water solution to stop mould building up inside it.

Try not to overdo the suctioning. Doing it more than three or four times a day can irritate the delicate lining of a baby’s nose. If your baby’s breathing seems laboured, they’re refusing feeds because of congestion, or the stuffiness lasts more than a week or two, check in with your pediatrician.

Cleaning Your Baby’s Genitals

This is one area where less is often more. Overcleaning can cause irritation, so the goal is gentle and simple, not thorough scrubbing.

Girls

A baby girl’s genitals are largely self-cleaning. Use a clean, wet washcloth or cotton wool and warm water, and wipe gently front to back through the folds. You don’t need soap every time, and you shouldn’t try to clean deep inside the labia, just the visible folds and creases. Pat dry afterwards rather than rubbing.

Boys, circumcised

If your baby has been circumcised, follow whatever aftercare instructions your doctor gave you, since practices vary slightly. Generally, avoid full baths (sponge baths only) until the area has healed, which usually takes about a week to ten days. Clean gently with warm water and a soft cloth, lifting the scrotum to clean underneath. Many doctors recommend a small amount of plain petroleum jelly on the area to stop it sticking to the nappy, rather than antibiotic ointment, since antibiotic ointments aren’t usually needed for healing to happen normally. Check with your doctor about which they’d recommend for your baby.

Boys, uncircumcised

Once the umbilical cord stump has fallen off and healed, regular baths are fine. The single most important thing to know here is that you should never force back an uncircumcised baby’s foreskin. It’s naturally attached to the head of the penis and isn’t meant to retract for years, sometimes not fully until the early teens. Forcing it can cause tearing, pain and scarring. Just wash the outside gently with warm water, and leave the rest alone. Retraction and cleaning underneath is something that happens naturally as your son gets older, and it’s worth mentioning to your pediatrician at check-ups so they can confirm things are developing normally.

Giving Eye Drops or Ointment

If your baby’s doctor has prescribed eye drops or ointment, for something like a blocked tear duct or conjunctivitis, the technique matters more than the fight to keep their eyes open.

How to do it:

1. Lay your baby flat on their back on a firm, clean surface, and have someone help hold them steady if you can.
2. You don’t need their eyes open. Gently pull down the lower eyelid and let a drop fall into the pocket between the eyelid and the eye, or run a thin line of ointment along the inner rim of the lower lid.
3. When your baby blinks, the medicine will spread across the eye naturally.
4. Never let the tip of the dropper or ointment tube touch your baby’s eye, eyelid or lashes, to avoid contaminating the bottle or causing irritation.
5. Wipe away any excess with a clean, damp cotton pad, working from the inner corner outward.

Always follow the dosing and timing your doctor gave you, and if you’re not confident with the technique, ask a nurse or pharmacist to show you once before you try it alone.

It Gets Easier

None of this feels natural the first time. Most parents fumble through their first rectal temperature, their first proper blowout, their first go at a suction bulb. The good news is that it becomes routine faster than you’d think, and within a few weeks you’ll be doing most of this on autopilot, often with one hand while eating breakfast with the other. If anything about your baby’s health, feeding or behaviour worries you, don’t hesitate to call your pediatrician or health visitor rather than guessing. That’s what they’re there for.