In our regular daily lives, we encounter fear in several aspects. Fearing failure, fearing not being good enough, and even fearing to be alone… whatever fear you have on the regular, multiply that times 10 when you become a mother, especially for new moms who don’t have enough confidence in her own motherly capabilities and instincts.
A lot of the times, after a baby is born, the new parents will receive a lot of help from friends and family to help out. Whether it’s watching the baby for a few hours so that you can take a nap for a few hours or going to the grocery store for you since you can’t bring the baby with you, overall, it’s a time where you don’t fully feel the stressors of being a new mom because you’re not going it alone.
Once all your company leaves and it’s just you relying on your own motherly instincts, that’s when those fears really start to kick in. These fears come to new moms whether you are a single mom or if you have a spouse. What a lot of moms don’t realize is that the fears they’re experiencing are completely normal but in their minds, doubt and uncertainty have taken over. We’re going to take a look at some of the most common fears new moms face that is completely normal.
Fearing That “Baby Blues” Means You Don’t Love Your Baby
According to the American Pregnancy Association, 70 to 80 percent of new mothers experience the baby blues. The baby blues are considered the mildest version of postpartum depression but nonetheless, the symptoms are the same. The difference is the severity of the symptoms. New mothers who experience the baby blues oftentimes experience feelings of:
- Crying for no reason
- Changes in Mood
It can be very confusing and overwhelming to new moms to experience sadness after such a happy life-changing event. The baby blues is said to be caused by hormonal changes after having the baby but they will eventually go away, and just because you have those feelings, it certainly doesn’t mean that you don’t love your baby. Talking about how you feel is a great way to deal with the baby blues.
Fearing That If You Want to Return to Work, You’re a Bad Mom
This particular fear is VERY common among new moms. For working women who love their jobs, who says you can’t have the best of both worlds? You can still be a super mom with the work ethic of a machine. One way that new moms are able to have the best of both worlds is that they are not afraid to admit when they need help.
New moms will often times hire a nanny to help with the baby and household chores while they’re at work. New moms who do this often catch a lot of slack from other moms from a safety standpoint. That’s understandable but that’s why you need to go through a trusted nanny service. Going through a trusted nanny service will bring you peace of mind that your baby and home is in good hands.
Fearing Losing Yourself in Your New Role as a New Mom
Before you had your baby, you were a fun-loving woman who enjoyed shopping, dancing, and reading. Why should you have to lose those qualities about yourself just because you became a mom? Well, you shouldn’t but as a new mom, your time will be occupied with new responsibilities but that doesn’t mean you have to give up the things you used to enjoy… that just means you have to be a little more strategic in planning doing the things you enjoy.
If you know that your baby takes an hour and a half nap at noon, that means you have an hour and a half to snuggle up with a good book until the baby wakes up. You just have to keep in mind that although you love your new role as a mother, there is so much more to you than being a mother. Make the time to get back to your old self when the time is right.
Fearing Doing “It” Wrong
Motherhood is one big smorgasbord of trial and error. Sure, there are books that tell you how to do certain things in raising your child but how do you think those authors were able to write those books? They were able to write those books based on their own trial and error experience with their kids! It’s helpful to have those books as a guide but no one knows your baby as you do. If you enter motherhood knowing that you’re not going to know everything and that you’re going to make mistakes, you’ll already be tackling motherhood like a pro!